Allowing time

Time is my current theme. The last couple of weeks I've been trying to allow myself time and space to be with my thoughts. I've started reading Francois Le Lord's book "Hector and the search for lost time". I've also tried to a greater extent to value time and space wherever I've found it.

In the therapy room I've allowed time and space to see what happens. What unfolds if we don't constantly fill the room or space with something?

In supervision the other day we also discussed allowing silence (and thereby unfilled time) into the therapy room. Something that can be very intimidating both for the client and the therapist. Yet, have so many functions.

I remember from my own therapy that I spent a number of sessions in silent anger. Being allowed that showed me that I could trust that the therapist would respect my needs. It turned out to be one of the most trust-building interventions she could have done.

In myself when I allow time, I sometimes get overwhelmed by my internal chatter and sometimes it take quite a while before that quiets down. The other day I participated in a buddhist meditation and no matter how much I tried that monkey brain wouldn't quiet down. Eventually I decided to invite it in. I visualised sitting it down next to me like a restless little child. I explained to it what we were doing. I saw this childish anticipation I sometimes see in my son. I told my monkey brain we need to settle to see the full picture. Eventually, the chatter quieted down and I could find a bit of peace again. It was a process though and it actually took the entire meditation practise to get there.

It is so easy to get swept away by today's hectic society. Our brain is constructed in a way that we think that faster means better and more although that is rarely the truth. Instead slower and more aware normally produce better and more long-term results. I so often fall into the trap och rushing things, forgetting that from my calm point of view things work more efficiently. Slowing down is for me the real challenge as I'm used to speed and a hectic lifestyle.

The moments of tranquil reflection I've allowed myself these past weeks has been absolutely invaluable. They have given me so much and changed my entire perspective on things. I see things clearer and understand what goes on inside me and around me at a completely different level. When I don't allow this time my focus becomes shortened and I only see what is closest in my mind's vision.

Knowing this I've this week invited the notion of mindset into the therapy room to. From what mindset do you want to approach the matters you are struggling with right now. How do you want to feel when you take on the issues you struggle with right now?